
Well, well, well, here we are in 2025, and if you thought Donald Trump learned anything from his first term, you’d be sorely mistaken. The man who once treated executive orders like autographed headshots is at it again, scribbling his name on legally dubious decrees as if that alone makes them enforceable. But just like last time, the courts have been busy slapping down his nonsense, reminding him (again) that being president doesn’t mean you get to play dictator. Let’s take a look at some of the biggest legal flops from Trump’s second round of executive order buffoonery.
First up, his latest attempt to revive the Muslim Ban - because nothing says new ideas like reheating old, unconstitutional garbage. This time, he tried broadening the list of banned countries, throwing in a few non-Muslim nations as if that would somehow make it legal. Spoiler alert: It didn’t. Judges quickly blocked it, pointing out that it was still driven by religious animus, still a violation of the Constitution, and still a terrible idea. But hey, points for consistency.
Then there was his executive order demanding an end to birthright citizenship, which he apparently thought he could just declare null and void; as if the 14th Amendment was some minor inconvenience rather than a bedrock of U.S. law. Courts shut it down so fast you’d think he tried signing away gravity. Even conservative judges couldn’t keep a straight face while ruling on it. But in typical Trump fashion, he ranted about activist judges; instead of, you know, reading the Constitution.
Not content with merely violating immigration law, Trump also took another swing at gutting environmental protections. He issued an order eliminating restrictions on fossil fuel production in protected lands, which was so blatantly illegal that even oil companies were hesitant to touch it. Federal courts ruled that, just like last time, he couldn’t override environmental laws with the stroke of a pen. It turns out, there’s a legal process for deregulation, and because he says so isn’t it.
And let’s not forget his latest attack on LGBTQ+ rights. Trump, still obsessed with rolling back progress, issued an order allowing businesses to deny service to LGBTQ+ customers under the guise of religious freedom. The courts shredded it almost immediately, ruling that discrimination isn’t suddenly legal just because Trump slaps a buzzword on it. But of course, he still played the victim, claiming Christian conservatives were being silenced by not being allowed to discriminate.
Speaking of legally illiterate moves, Trump decided to go after the media again, signing an executive order attempting to weaken libel protections so he could sue news outlets more easily. It was an obvious First Amendment violation, and the courts wasted no time tossing it out. Apparently, nobody told Trump that you can’t rewrite the Constitution just because it hurts your feelings.
His crusade against “woke corporations”also made it into executive order form, with a directive trying to punish companies that implemented diversity programs. Unfortunately for him, the courts reminded him (again) that the government can’t just punish businesses for having policies he doesn’t like. Free market, remember? Not that Trump ever understood how capitalism actually works.
Perhaps the most hilarious failure was his executive order claiming he could unilaterally set new election laws, requiring only paper ballots and banning early voting. This one didn’t even survive a full news cycle before being laughed out of court. Judges were practically tripping over themselves to explain that the federal government doesn’t have that power. It was a legal defeat so swift and brutal, you’d think he tried outlawing math. Which he may, because you know, red states.
Trump also tried, once again, to defund sanctuary cities, because apparently, he doesn’t remember losing this fight multiple times already. Courts blocked it instantly, citing the exact same constitutional issues as before. At this point, you have to wonder if he even listens to his own lawyers or just enjoys wasting taxpayer money on lawsuits he’s destined to lose.
And finally, because no Trump presidency is complete without a self-serving scam, he signed an executive order trying to weaken conflict-of-interest laws for federal officials; convenient, considering the corruption already piling up in his second term. But, surprise! The courts said no. Even his handpicked judges weren’t willing to set fire to ethics laws just to protect him.
So here we are, watching the sequel to Trump’s legal humiliation tour. If his first term taught us anything, it’s that he governs like he’s never heard of the Constitution and his second term is proving no different. The only difference now? The courts are even faster at swatting down his nonsense. Maybe by 2029, he’ll finally understand that Sharpie signatures don’t override the law but let’s not hold our breath.
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