Marjorie Taylor Greene, the GOP’s resident conspiracy theorist and part-time insurrection apologist, has somehow managed to land yet another undeserved position of power - this time as chair of the House Subcommittee on Digital Oversight of Government Entities (DOGE). Yes, the same woman who believes Jewish space lasers started wildfires is now in charge of a committee that, at least in theory, is supposed to ensure transparency and accountability in government operations. If you don’t find that hilarious, you haven’t been paying attention.
But, of course, it gets better. Almost immediately after her appointment, Greene conveniently decided to buy a hefty chunk of Tesla stock, right as DOGE was gearing up to push through policies that would disproportionately benefit companies just like Tesla. Now, to the untrained eye, this might look a whole lot like blatant corruption, but to the modern Trumpzi Party, it’s standard operating procedure.
Let's take a moment to appreciate the sheer audacity of it all. Greene, a woman who once ranted about Democrats being the party of insider trading and corruption, is now engaging in the very behavior she pretends to oppose. This is the same person who throws tantrums about the “Deep State” while gleefully stuffing her pockets with stocks that stand to gain from her own committee’s decisions. The hypocrisy is so thick you could cut it with one of the many assault rifles she regularly poses with in campaign ads.
And while we’re talking about hypocrisy, let’s not forget the GOP’s performative outrage over government intervention in the economy. These are the same people who scream about the free market whenever there’s talk of regulating Wall Street or taxing billionaires. But when it comes to rigging the system for their own portfolios? Suddenly, government power is a wonderful thing. Who needs principles when you can make a quick buck?
As if this wasn’t already a farce, DOGE itself has been at the center of repeated legal challenges. Federal courts have repeatedly smacked down its more outlandish overreaches, ruling that its attempts to bypass oversight and funnel money to favored industries violate multiple laws. But rather than take the hint and rein in its abuses, the Republican-led committee has doubled down - now under the watchful (if vacant) gaze of Greene. She’s not there to fix anything. She’s there to ensure that the grift continues uninterrupted.
Tesla, of course, is an interesting choice for Greene. It’s run by Elon Musk, a man whose entire personality is a mix of meme-posting, union-busting, and pretending to be Tony Stark while his engineers do all the real work. He’s the kind of right-wing-adjacent tech bro that Greene and her fellow MAGA lackeys adore - an anti-woke billionaire who still needs government subsidies to keep his businesses afloat. In many ways, their alliance is a perfect encapsulation of modern Republican politics: a mix of populist rhetoric and corporate bootlicking, all wrapped up in a smug, self-righteous package.
Let’s also not ignore the timing. Greene and her GOP colleagues have spent years trying to convince their base that Democrats are the real villains when it comes to stock manipulation and insider trading. They love to yell about Nancy Pelosi’s trades (which, to be fair, do deserve scrutiny), but when one of their own does something far worse? Silence. Suddenly, transparency and ethics take a backseat to party loyalty.
And let’s not forget the voters who keep putting these people in power. MAGAt Republicans claim to be against corruption, against elites gaming the system, against politicians enriching themselves at the expense of everyday Americans. And yet, they’ll cheerfully line up to defend Greene, a woman who’s making money off her own political influence faster than she can spread QAnon nonsense.
Of course, none of this will lead to any consequences. The Republican Party has long since abandoned any pretense of ethical governance. Greene won’t face any real investigation. The same media outlets that spent years ranting about Hunter Biden’s laptop won’t bat an eye at her stock trades. And GOP voters? They’ll shrug, claim this is different and go back to watching Newsmax tell them it’s all part of a deep-state plot against America.
It’s all so predictable, so shameless, and so incredibly on-brand. The Republican Party isn’t a political movement anymore, it’s just a grift wrapped in a culture war, designed to keep people too distracted by outrage to notice how thoroughly they’re being fucked over. And Marjorie Taylor Greene? She’s just one more bubbleheaded con artist, laughing all the way to the bank.
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